let's dance becouse deth is closer....
"IN THE LAND OF ETERNAL REST"
author: Suzanne Volter
Prolog.
Aggressively he is becoming involved in my crotch.
Secret, accidental, strange-indifferent stranger. Maleness hidden under appearances of the gentle helpfulness. Greedy for showing emotions, to her emotions greedy. Willingness on the rein, desires on the tether. Aggression above the average. Words uniquely gentle. However reactions? Anxiety-invasive. Analysis of the crotch superficial. Trivial, pushing averages physiognomy, alternately with train and the charm. He needs for her, one can see it. But he needs something more, of interesting him anal-masturbation with lifestyle. Alone wandering through nooks of climatic events. The cause and the effect excluded from the receipt in the real, but not-fitting in cyber space.
What am I writing it up to?
Whether it is a portrait of the skirt-chaser from the station Polish State Railways, on one voraciously perilous sex?
Whether it is portrait of my alleged murderer of dreams? Of that elderly gentleman approximately dizzily exciting me from the illusion?
Is it recalling these a few moments, the heartless, little specified intercourse in my awareness?
And this realistic memory can? Where from did it come? How did these words turn up at my head?
The cold touch of hands, the besmirched body of the young, attractive woman. Being on the tether and in the power of the omnipresent empathy of aromatic-sound stimuli.
The sharp smell of urine, the rough touch of hands.
I am in the middle, by the edge, on the verge of recalling the footpath leading me to the middle. I am standing and I am looking all around. In the head a decision to come back and to tell a story about remarkable moving close two people is taking shape.
Popularly understood as love, in essence but too complicated to synonymous assessments. Of negative, as well as positive assessments, but never not indifferent. I am starting back dreaming. I am coming back till the beginning, in place where my mention will revive to the another life.
There is a beautiful sunny day, as me still won't cause the difference. I always put the sunglasses on so that glitter of the sun doesn't kill remains for me for the soul. I am getting up and I am bathing my face with spring water. I am brushing teeth, I am putting the blouse and shorts on. Very short. Buttocks gently are plumping out beneath bottom with their edge. I wasn't in the habit of hiding the breast into the invention of the woman from the 19the century, the real feminist. The superfluousness is alien to me. I am going to town, I am crossing a street. Vehicles of all type are passing me in spelunker's scale pans. I am passing exhibitions, next mirrors, shop windows. Where am I making my way? Whom I am amongst of the ones colourfully- of motley urban melancholy?
My legs are putting opened steps. Sure about one's menstrual ups and downs of life. I am heading towards the death in the not very obvious way, however every day I push that close far and of oneself. Suddenly….
….I'm lie on the, damp, wet, vile earth. By me ON. He is surrounding me with one's shoulder, is whispering charming love phrases joyfully. Don't scream, I want you, be with me, tiny. I am in panic and I am starting squeakily claiming the freedom for myself. Leave behind me! Don't get back the only thing which I have only for oneself…… from me!!!!! Don't take the Freedom away from me! Yes, hold my body, it is a nature poorly and badly warped. But leave it for me, what is eternal law of choice! Only, that ON…..
…it seems to hear one another individual syllables but not words. He isn't sensitive for women's laments but desire and the greed are impairing his perception of events. The purpose has one, aggressively to become involved in my crotch. What we are calling caresses is leaving for my future.
In a way I am grateful for that kindness to it. How could I claim the right at the moment to something more? Yes, it is my Saviour. Perpetrator of my lasciviousness and the covetous nature of my passions in the future. Of luxuriant fantasy, alternately swinging oneself around mas-schizo-sad-urge which won't already forever leave me.
Now no longer I am missing ……………… behind the house, the too soothing smell of bread and the starched bedding. I already want nothing for myself, because freed from the possessive ego, I can make more than different. I am for one with ghost, for different with desire for the non-existence.
But in that memory a fact of phenomena is my seriousness over-sensual. I want to remind myself what then I smelt. But not in the emotional sense, because the ones at me are usually copied.
I want the return into my nostrils of the smell around this of moment. How did he smell? Probably I won't remind myself these hands cutting my freedom but I am going to seek their image of the life in my awareness until my end defiled. But smell…?????
If I believed in God, I could pronounce so for it prayer: let me one more time smell this smell, for God's so that I never forget the fragrance of the death and the fall. Yes, if believed… actually, why I don't believe in God? Why don't I have this archetype in myself? Whether he is given few and chosen?
I remember that as a child I was being taught about certain laws and commandments. World was mosaic sorted out, certain order. In the while after the sincere verification for my heart of these relations, I started belabouring the nature of the sin. Of it because in me indeed was quite a lot. Bodily probably the most. And suddenly I am reading that „self-denial” is a cardinal sin in the very important matter! Yeah just a minute, I am doing a lot, but certainly not abnegate I am belabouring things, rather it to the row parts. So…???? Yes, I live without the sin and my bloody- lesbian nature is warping the parental power. I just think so! Ha ha ha, beware parents! One's daughters into tethers but sons into cuffs. I in this text already too much revelled, so to finish the time.
Into next parts about it, in what way with the help Miriam I rebuilt my besmirched nature of the femininity!
In the land of the eternal rest. Cz.1
I lifted oneself higher and higher over lands, forests, rivers, waters, the time. Spaces merged into the unity and the time smoothed its bends. Out of this many thoughts she stays, out of this many faces - with the one you remember. I am putting consecutive paces but I don't smell base. I am treading above the earth, I am slowly breaking away since the time. Like on the outskirts of town, do I live without the possibility of the return? Ways won't clash but they will stay endlessly directly opposite.. This way I will be heading, already forever, to the land of my eternal rest. There are senses, not-can consume reality. There are thoughts, not-wanting the word but without the announced admission they are becoming involved in the awareness. I had a feeling, that not to have control of them it is a crime. I wanted to get the control. Internal calmness. But pain was left as the bloody toll. And I lost that control, forever. This miserable existence amongst the healthy human kind how it seemed to me was impossible. The only way led into the land of the eternal non-existence. No, it an escape could not be, too quickly she would be made. It is a, gradual, long-lasting, explicit process. Comparable with making the organism conditional on the drug this way, products of our mind can be chemically toxic, and chemistry when the time will become involved in the system, is killing thoroughly.
Detoxicating here won't help. There are always tracks on crossed footpaths of our sojourn. It remained so to wait, not much however I knew, what for
Of creatures it is in the land of the eternal peace a lot of, all very friendly. They aren't showing the unnecessary, courteous kindliness. They don't want more beyond the nature. They are hiding their desires always, inside, but only under the thin surface of the skin. Always opened to your frenzy, under eyelids are preserving yesterday's images from dreams.
They aren't screaming, they aren't accosting, they are full of the illusion and songs are whispering in your ear wasted.
These creatures know that your end will come sooner or later therefore they are patient and they aren't seeking the interest. The land in which I was is standing out for one reason. Here everything is given forever, for free and at once. There is no therefore of poverty, despair, collapse into the chaos. Choosing her you want to travel here more than the eternity. You crave for only that being united with the land of the eternal rest, independently whether your eyes just dreamt.
Cars are heading in one's vehement pace ahead, with road about the moderately popular name.
I beside. Ruled out. On the edge of the life. Outside the current of the present time. I am standing this way as erect as the string, flexing one's buttocks, tightening thighs in order not to lose one's femininity. I am exposing my inherent abilities to attract to the public judgement. The man became my ogre for taming, to the power struggle above my delight. Heart of the hurt woman, indifferently, with which cruelly, will never plunge in the confidence in its saviour. Probably, it will be angel from the eternity or some torturer, what with one move for that hurt being an end of torment is able to cut the throat and to buy it panes. But I could not of nobody so to meet, not even here, not even in the land my rest.
My thoughts ran after tracks left by the torturer, and I thought where these birthmarks would lead me. Now I know that they were a pass to world about more refined tenderness.
I don't remember exactly when on my footpath I met damned souls Miriam. This event was for me so excitingly emotional that completely it had covered tracks of its being up. As the sandstorm, what passing by us he is putting all grains of the life away, this way the meeting with Myrrhs caused the transformation in me in cyber-awarness it to appear from dreams, sweeping my life out beyond the bracket of the existence, actually to its edge. One thing is certain, she captured the Land of the Eternal Rest, like the self-appointed queen. She adopted rule in the kingdom where I was you for myself. But that history won't end so straight, since I was going to dethrone it, to belittle its service and to envelop the throne of my serfdom for the second time..
Any time I can run Cz.2
Return from the land of the eternal rest.
Another step back and I will stay here forever. In some moment I could turn back, but with one's eyes fixed on the abyss and the time completely I forgot myself. A walk remained for me on the edge, urban busy communities and the dance amongst foul-smelling streets. The short girl has coloured pencils in the pencil box, older tampons in the vanity case. The adult woman apart from memories and wrinkled cheeks is already leaving nothing for itself. The authority of the being about which he knows extremely quite a lot is inviting her to chats by cognac or the coffee. I didn't want to be in a century for adults, I sought the lost time, in order can see one's face in the mirror, to look at oneself and to express joy for the body, for the soul and the heart. Those yearnings for men were supposed to save small Su so that experiences soothing, father's love one more time what looking at his short princess joyfully for her will whisper to the ear: welcome little doll! Let us dance!
But the lost time in the paradise disappeared, for paths of the virginity I won't return. After the first meeting with the guy to say I can whether love is attainable in our future bedroom. In bitch calculating creatures from the Land of the Eternal Rest exchanged me and the bad queen persistently chained me to the throne and at her legs she seated. She gave me the serfdom for years and I enjoyed defiled joy to the full. With kisses of the throne to atone I wanted my being but for her insatiable will demanded the rule from me so a lot. For me a queen fueled desires, when discouraged I put the head for her on knees. She plied with insults from her womb, she wreathed with thighs, invited into corridors of desires opening the new door every now and then. This magic theatre drew me so firmly that I forgot about my losing. She fed me on delicacies putting better tit-bits of the amatory illusion every now and then into the mouth. I willingly swallowed them down and widely I opened my mouth ready to adopt every male demand and every feminine doubt. Crouching, always beside, my queen stood fueling desires for them to boil in my temples.
I put to escape, to break free from the rule. To exchange the weakness by force and to starve every cell of one's body so that she sucks supplies and bodily yearnings. Hunger deepened but I didn't let desires in senses release temptation. Held on the tether and infuriated to the max, by surprise ran their tormented coalition. I included the control. I was as the stepmother what with the whip is subjugating one's adulterous children every individually training for oneself next time. I knew that it is they at one time would provide to me with surviving.
I gathered all my strength for the contest, the queen didn't already so firmly defend her borders. I entered my lands, proud, straightened, conscious of one's power. With the army breastfed with own breasts, I left behind human, crude, common games. I started implementing new principles of action and my ideas forged in the logic of events. Willingly subjects accepted the new Woman. They were grateful for those experiences to her. Now forever the created femininity fell, but straight and greedy nature, lured to the obedience, overcame my fears and greed's.
On the highest platform in the Land of the Eternal Rest attitude one's palace. I will seat myself on the throne which is him facing to my womb. On the right-hand side they will appear loyal, on the left the ones which I will behead and I will burn at the stake. I am thinking whether I am supposed to be a cruel queen and whether I am able so to be. In the fight because, my aggressive I it was left stripped off and tamed, so anew I must probably revive the ability to destroy in myself. But this time it will be refined, physically instinctive and spitefully causative for every became musty of ravenous being.
I will start my rule over the sexual land with the great travel to breaking points. I will invite most eminent and most beautiful lovers of entire madness here. The land of the Eternal Rest will receive the new name: of Eternal Delight! Everyone who will be opposed to my governments, he will be executed, I am not tolerating the different opinion, I will name this system SEKSUALdemokracy. And by the throne they will have the admission to the chamber few, chosen by me. The rest let will rot away in its gutters, excrement and puke. I became the merciless Woman.
In the land of the eternal rest pt 3.
Times of the deceptive bliss ensued. Lascivious queen, after dethroning one's rival, she decided that the serfdom would be abolished, a time of the equality and the sexual promiscuity will ensue. Social class of old order however didn't disappear. In the Land of Delight a truly exceptional division was supposed to become scratched. To her throne the queen invited deviant individuals exclusively extremely, so which rotten and cold senses were able to interest and to stimulate for her. They seemed to be a favoured group Akrotomofilities . Individuals about gloomy, pale faces and the look full of the lascivious beauty. They had satin, black-purple robes which with pride they put to their warped, naked bodies. They didn't wear the underwear, and they have caused needed obstruction once a year. They were impurity saint. They satisfied their erotic urges desiring the person faulty and besmirched, for them however were it is for the belle worth the great sacrifice. Also in their caste, inside, female persons were, bodily flaws which they appointed had them for their partners. One they had breasts without teats, they were different without the hand, or legs. Those the disability was a pass to world of sexual imaginations Akrotomofilities. They treated them with pride and the circumspection. The queen adored to savour the view of their naked bodies during sexual orgies. She ascended the throne completely naked, for her the body smelt of oils of the mint, the ginger and the gardenia. From her pussy however the smell was so intense from the excitement, that he had stretched around the entire royal chamber. Her satin, black-golden bedding saturated with the smell pussy secretions, semen's of its lovers, sweat and blood which the queen dropped for itself passionately into the golden goblet, after every undergone relationship one each millilitre. They were the second peculiarly cherished group of sexual deviants Zoofilities . Very queen at one time experienced lascivious pleasure around with one's mutts, when she was still a young and inexperienced little woman, when the eroticism was a perilous enough game, that passionately she had caressed dogs, ordering them to lick clean juices of their youthful womb. Of course it didn't give the permanent train to relationships rise to at her with the game, rather this way later she treated her lovers. They were only dogs for her, which done up on the leash could yelp at its large bed. For her sinful memories from the past caused that for that group she had felt the great kindness outstandingly. She gave them all needed priorities on orgiastic meetings surrendered. Outside also individuals were regular guests from the group Tanatofilies, specially selected from the entire country. Proudly they enacted stages of the own death so that triggered with erection at the queen to please and to familiarize it with the state of stunning senses. This court theatre caused that living in the palace had swum much more curiously. Young boys have most often been actors about the beautiful, pale skin, very beautiful privates and woefully sad eyes. This view very much amused the queen, since she loved the game of contrasts in human passions. She detested the uniformity and the predictability of erotic events. If some closeness evoked the boredom at her, immediately she sent back to her awareness his participants to edges and she reproached from the palace. Therefore subjects have invented newer games every now and then, from pissing into crystal glass small glasses and little bottles so that can place them on etageres, by plying it with series of photographs of the charming body in positions of delight in which she played a part of the porno starlet. Funniest and favourite however for the Queen was a game narratofilies . She adored with hours to hold talks about one's sexual activities and subjects in the palace. For her funny gossip was being thought up and alone she also made a list one's in the pocketbook, bound in leather from the baby. Beyond the bracket social arrangementat in the kingdom for you threw away: kleptofilities , hyfefilities and ekstrementofilities . These groups fell into disgrace, since contacts with the neighbouring, nonfriendly kingdom and his master, the black prince held about sad-masochistic roots. Cruel man that he competed and he claimed the throne for himself in the Land of Delight, so the queen had to cautiously select for itself of one's companions so that a spy and an informer of the prince aren't among them. He could then hand down to him the newest techniques of sexual intercourses and deprive it of the throne. Dark kingdom of the prince, where the power fell among others stygmatofilikities, pyrofilikies , nekrofilikies and gerontofilikies , into dominion they took over insidiously, depriving the Queen of the influence for years. Therefore the reluctant queen was it for social groups what he/she isn't marking, that she didn't have similar desires. For example very much she was tied mentally and emotionally around piktofilikies , raptofilikies and symforofilikies . Alone she was fond of checking breaking points of the own drive to the destruction and aggression. She planned therefore to possess at one time, after reinforcing one's power, into having those groups and to lead them to the Land of Delight so that they settle and they lived in the bliss. Of course into the portrait gallery of her acquaintances the queen invited only deviants exclusive, that is to an permanently marked with the brand of deviation, rather than casual adventurers, from the leap of the anyone wishing with show to capture its heart and interesting.
Yes, living in the Land of Delight, the kingdom where the illusion is alternating with reality, but cyber-love with the real, swam with one's sluggish rhythm. Subjects played delicious, on tables young and well-toned women have always been full with basket cases knocked down willingly, the smell of their warm pussies not only delighted of lovers, but everyone who came to these sides. Cyber-walkers, sleepwalkers, divorcees, jaded princesses and ingenuous con men. Sellers of love wanting to sell it desire cheap and fanatic tormentors. Indeed this kingdom was a rich menagerie, and their queen as the magnet pulled all anyone wishing to herself to fulfil desire for the closeness.
If for you such experiences are immediate, you will certainly understand this fascination, but if you didn't still acquire the knowledge of secret inter-courses, this that story will seem to you the hilarious babble. And it can and even better, I will be not having .. to explain, whether real and those experiences are mine. Alone you will judge it.
In the Land of the Eternal rest pt 4
Travel to the Lake of Tears.
Ready procession, we can move – queen, a lackey said. Once a year the queen has set off on the travel to the Lake of Tears. Distant and distant ends of the kingdom, where the time is undergoing shortening, and space of the deformation, is becoming wrinkled and is pulling up under the influence of the light. To those edge it is possible to get only with one road, flowing to the other side of depths through the Lake of Tears. The travel is long and tiring, the same as preparations for it. The queen is making ablution of her body then, he is rubbing into his body fragrance, he is fasting through nine days, drinking only a spring water and he isn't undergoing sexual relationships. He is putting snowy-white robes on, he is shaving off hair on the pussy and the head, he is trapping nails. During a trip she will be reading only a Book of Revelations, the secret, bound into the scarlet satin book which nobody outside it can affect. In the kingdom amaranth and the lofty scarlet, the source of the immortality are a basic colour and a food. He lets the queen clean the harmful element causing swellings on hands and shoulders at her off the body, skwalen included in this thanksgiving plant is delivering the antidote to it. When he reaches his destination, he will sent the lackey back to the palace. The queen will stand up on the river lake, entire one's body will just spread fatty cream of the colour purplish red. He will take out seven small crystal glass little bottles of the big suitcase, in every a substance of the human origin is: urine, blood, sweat, tears, sewage, semen, juices of pussies. One should mix substances in the pearl goblet which will consume the light about the noon. Next he must drink this mélange of political elixir. Now, this way the prepared queen will wet her naked body in waters of the lake. They will lay on the edge, and will be waiting to the sunset. Then it will take place for her transformation..……………………………………….
Edges lakes became cold and marmoreally steep. Emerald and freezing water. Coolness constricted for the queen, on fingers of hands and legs had teats pale ciliates. She finally saw the Messenger. He gave her the sign for the travel. The transformation in the end could end up $AV$. She jumped into the water and she dove into depths, to the kingdom called the Land of Tears.
…………………………………………………………………………………………………..
She swam into the abyss, the black abyss. One after the other she passed levels inhabited by aqueous creatures: frosty dragonflies, voluted sea anemones, putrefactive lake spiders, fish without-gills, blind-fish, rapatak’s, moss’es and scorching hot. All they gave her a heartfelt smile. Sometimes she had a feeling, that too warmly. She wasn't lonely, she felt strange, but safely. All the time she swam deep into breathing lungs-gills during the transformation however given it by the Messenger, legs they merged and they covered with scales. She was a sea alarm about the supple and trained body. Distance towards the epicentre reduced and she felt butterflies in the belly. They fluttered with their wings as added pepper, just as if wanted to do for her out of spite or very much to piss it off. But was so deep that she could not turn back. It will be for a few moments on the other side, so she decided to ignore this provocation.
Dull and blunt sound crushed temples for her, he sewed through by feet to the skull. The skin started going numb, to creak, finally to crack. She came off all over the short distance, scales fell. The queen sat on the cold, marble lakeside, in the former human form. Pure, beautiful, new leather. She looked at hands, legs, the belly. She got to know her body and surprised with lightness, with which a transformation, moved to borders took place, started spasmodically laughing. She spent the hysterical giggles childishly. It lasted for it rather long and the lackey waiting for her return already for some time began to bore. Now the Queen didn't hesitate in her intentions. She came up to him and with one efficient movement cut for it head with samurai sword. The head came off surprised to the ground, she goggled and in the last breath she asked: why? I am not having .. for you to excuse myself! a queen cried – and she kicked the head so firmly, that the one rolling broke down into short distances. Yeah, now I was amused by – the queen dressed her robes, she put on stockings, the corselette of the leather unicorn and she moved into the return track to the Land of Delight.
Prophet and passions. Part 5
The act of cutting the haircut granted a new course of events the lackey in the kingdom. The freed queen from the dictatorship of the body had to now possess secrets of the spiritual influence on subjects and their sexual world. She felt a desire for the absolute power, she marked everyone who didn't abide by its requirements, spouting urine out for them to the mouth and doing the scar under the right shoulder. In exercising that diktat he mattered greatly Cyber-Prophet, willing and greedy for bodily experiences, with the knowledge much going beyond beyond customary understanding the sex and its power of the influence on subjects. And so the queen used his pointers, she sought advice of it in issues of the realization of cruel aims. Throughout the country a semi-darkness and silence fell. Groans during orgiastic parties severely were forbidden, and passions had to be a control and a power under the constant for the queen. It was a priority to realize whims for her, even the ones cruelest in one's form. Less they already fascinated perversion with the queen, and they started entertaining the courting games marked with aggression about the clean and lascivious form. She adored to tie and to put loops on from ropes to necks of one's lovers, to tighten it firmly while climaxing, and if some subject on the face showed at least a bit of the panic, she strangled him mercilessly, jumping in addition on his member, as if she settled the bull's hash. The groan of the strangled stallion incited her to borders of the possibility.
Times became dark. In the kingdom hunger and illness fell. However the queen worked out around Cyber-Prophet way to survive. Bodies of strangled lovers were being thrown into vats with the row of various spices and substance created from its regulations. They were being cooked and they were giving to tables. The queen was fond with view of, not conscious of nothing, eating their lovers subjects consuming those dishes, to be perhaps yesterday surrendering oneself to them. Because he is an essence of love to love to pain and to want second so insistently that eating its body is only bringing satisfaction. The queen felt how for the goddess and in a way she got that divinity. Tax return of semen of lovers and their blood poured out of wounds turned over during sexual relationships, the queen treated an specific antidote to boredom and becoming indifferent. She wanted above all else to measure her divinity with the divine prince of the darkness which one day she saw strolling around gardens of delight. He stood naked, proudly straightened, his privates about dimensions exceeding the standard. One look at such a beautiful prick in the feint was enough for her imagination to glide into areas of crazy sex experiments. She wanted to have possibility of biting his shapely buttocks and licking the behind, for putting the anus for it of various kind of toys, so as for example gold and crystal glass plugi, or pellets of the geisha. She wanted to flog it with the whip about iron catches and to tear its tasty flesh out all over the short distance on the back.
The queen put on sadomasochistic, lecherous dresses coming exclusively from the tailor's shops which alone she designed. Then she could only look at her subjects, she could dress beloveds of lovers to the evening fulfilment. She wanted the prince with all her might, to possess, to dominate his prick and to subjugate the mind. To experience how at the moment she can't ed stand the sight of .. , it was only given her to look and to fill one's senses up, to stimulate imagination still anew. She started falling down in numbness's madness, with hours swung her lighted body on the swing of delight, letting it for lovers scarcely lick the wet and wett pussy. She put collars and leashes on for them to necks, she led for walks in the palace, but they and living quarters for farm labourers had to submit themselves to her, she was pissing of them and spat on them. As soon as she had the willingness, she whipped with the horsewhip, sometimes so firmly that blood pulsing in their bodies from the excitement oozed through times for their dog-tired bodies. Being cruel is entertaining me - said. Nobody of you, lovers the same fallen, as lofty didn't cause me absolute delight until now!!! Until I possess the prince and his kingdom, I will be as much alone for you inaccessibly cruel, every desiring waking up in me every day without its body. For the first time the queen couldn't see the different answer to this drama, like only to appear in the ego of the prince by applying magic „Corruption of self-awareness” elixir. It threatened with losing by her and for her chosen one of senses. It could happen, that he wouldn't remember, whom he is. However power, with which she wanted one's chosen she was so huge, that in order to turn a course of events away, it was unfortunately too late. She left her corporality, she subjugated the spirituality, now she decided to cause the absolute thing - to join forever with one's chosen and to finish the rule. However I will describe that brutal scene next time, when the rain in the Land of Delight washes sadness away, and the wind assuages senses of left subjects of the kingdom, what in the chaos of despair and the oblivion taken of for oneself living.
Death of the Queen. Cz.6
She went the hill up, keeping the business end of the dagger proudly by the breast, the hand had cold and wanted to finish it quickly. One's hateful torment with oneself. He will wait for the semi-darkness, then probably an ON. will turn up His bright face and caramel eyes. Lightly brushed back to the back, medium-length hair. Swarthy from the wind, naked body. Carved shoulders like at the angel, very well cylindrical buttocks and privates fulfilled in delight. When our last closeness is supposed to look, whether it will be the ending included in sadness, or becoming the height this conversation? The body desires and he wants, but mind, where the evil appeared, without desire doesn't let her for tasting the lover of the night. He is sending back to the ego all thoughts deep into, he doesn't want to see his smallness. He is as whore tied up, on the neck with the collar, embarrassingly nice got very hungry to sensory experiences with him. Exposed to public torment with own thoughts is doing battle straight through dangerously explicit. Because the ending is beginning in drowning its sorrows, on freeing the body. Desire is persistent, the Prince is taking her into the land of his darkness, its eyes are blind, unseeing joys. They are giving passively, safe and free. He is only a bird what one's body is raising for fulfilling the eternal place, where orgasm is the height constantly beings. Uniting with the lover this way beautiful fear is seizing her already wishes himself nothing, and only for experiencing shared delight. The prince is making an incision in the wrist, he is giving into the mouth her his blood, for you he is drinking its essence of the life passionately. For her he is elixir and essence. He is becoming him. He is making him out, he is uniting with the body with the soul, the ego. For this desire she was born. For this moment she is ready to die. He is stretching the wing feather out with one move is putting the blade into the artery on the neck. She is feeling warmly, drowsily, he is swimming away. The prince is uttering the penetrating, deaf shout. He is rising to the sky and with shoulders dragged out to clouds he is turning into the nocturnal butterfly. There is a night. Coolness and the icy cold wind. The moment, but wings will still harden, their flutter will stop. Another human breath, but living died out to hundredth seconds. The land of the Eternal Rest no longer exists. The land remained for Delight, but without one's queen what spontaneously deprived oneself of throne. But left her passions for subjects in made a list with own blood from silk menstruation „Largest pages of the delight” Book.
Epilogue.
…
In the end I was found.
I started a family, I gave birth to two children, I fell in love with the husband. I left the dark universe of the illusion behind. From darkness and all subjects the kingdom alone absorbed the prince into itself. I am cooking dinner, like the good mum. No longer I am visiting sides of the ignorance covered with heavy, velveteen veils. I walk for walks with children and the husband, to the park. The touch is the height of love, to it I don't need perversion. What was fascination is subjugated. They accused me, that I hate people, I don't comprehend, why? There are good and bad days in my life, but always in the context of love. Finished studies, times of the frenzy and the luxuriant erotic fantasy also. Travel into the cabbage stalk of my mind, where demons lurked was finished. Past: the childhood and the youth, I described, I cried and combined I returned to oneself, to the life, to the husband and children. Now he is as a default and calmly. Through six months, lying in wait and writing blogs, I deepened the own psyche in order to make cleaning. I did it publicly, I made the confession towards net the public. I don't pity not a single one word, because it was real, swimming from deep inside for my soul, from the dark, turned plot of the life which I wanted in this way to share with you. Every living is important, every peculiarly unique, I believe, that also and my. And happiness more often than we think comes. Unexpectedly.
I am greeting warmly.
Suzanne Volter.
Paris.
author: Suzanne Volter
Prolog.
Aggressively he is becoming involved in my crotch.
Secret, accidental, strange-indifferent stranger. Maleness hidden under appearances of the gentle helpfulness. Greedy for showing emotions, to her emotions greedy. Willingness on the rein, desires on the tether. Aggression above the average. Words uniquely gentle. However reactions? Anxiety-invasive. Analysis of the crotch superficial. Trivial, pushing averages physiognomy, alternately with train and the charm. He needs for her, one can see it. But he needs something more, of interesting him anal-masturbation with lifestyle. Alone wandering through nooks of climatic events. The cause and the effect excluded from the receipt in the real, but not-fitting in cyber space.
What am I writing it up to?
Whether it is a portrait of the skirt-chaser from the station Polish State Railways, on one voraciously perilous sex?
Whether it is portrait of my alleged murderer of dreams? Of that elderly gentleman approximately dizzily exciting me from the illusion?
Is it recalling these a few moments, the heartless, little specified intercourse in my awareness?
And this realistic memory can? Where from did it come? How did these words turn up at my head?
The cold touch of hands, the besmirched body of the young, attractive woman. Being on the tether and in the power of the omnipresent empathy of aromatic-sound stimuli.
The sharp smell of urine, the rough touch of hands.
I am in the middle, by the edge, on the verge of recalling the footpath leading me to the middle. I am standing and I am looking all around. In the head a decision to come back and to tell a story about remarkable moving close two people is taking shape.
Popularly understood as love, in essence but too complicated to synonymous assessments. Of negative, as well as positive assessments, but never not indifferent. I am starting back dreaming. I am coming back till the beginning, in place where my mention will revive to the another life.
There is a beautiful sunny day, as me still won't cause the difference. I always put the sunglasses on so that glitter of the sun doesn't kill remains for me for the soul. I am getting up and I am bathing my face with spring water. I am brushing teeth, I am putting the blouse and shorts on. Very short. Buttocks gently are plumping out beneath bottom with their edge. I wasn't in the habit of hiding the breast into the invention of the woman from the 19the century, the real feminist. The superfluousness is alien to me. I am going to town, I am crossing a street. Vehicles of all type are passing me in spelunker's scale pans. I am passing exhibitions, next mirrors, shop windows. Where am I making my way? Whom I am amongst of the ones colourfully- of motley urban melancholy?
My legs are putting opened steps. Sure about one's menstrual ups and downs of life. I am heading towards the death in the not very obvious way, however every day I push that close far and of oneself. Suddenly….
….I'm lie on the, damp, wet, vile earth. By me ON. He is surrounding me with one's shoulder, is whispering charming love phrases joyfully. Don't scream, I want you, be with me, tiny. I am in panic and I am starting squeakily claiming the freedom for myself. Leave behind me! Don't get back the only thing which I have only for oneself…… from me!!!!! Don't take the Freedom away from me! Yes, hold my body, it is a nature poorly and badly warped. But leave it for me, what is eternal law of choice! Only, that ON…..
…it seems to hear one another individual syllables but not words. He isn't sensitive for women's laments but desire and the greed are impairing his perception of events. The purpose has one, aggressively to become involved in my crotch. What we are calling caresses is leaving for my future.
In a way I am grateful for that kindness to it. How could I claim the right at the moment to something more? Yes, it is my Saviour. Perpetrator of my lasciviousness and the covetous nature of my passions in the future. Of luxuriant fantasy, alternately swinging oneself around mas-schizo-sad-urge which won't already forever leave me.
Now no longer I am missing ……………… behind the house, the too soothing smell of bread and the starched bedding. I already want nothing for myself, because freed from the possessive ego, I can make more than different. I am for one with ghost, for different with desire for the non-existence.
But in that memory a fact of phenomena is my seriousness over-sensual. I want to remind myself what then I smelt. But not in the emotional sense, because the ones at me are usually copied.
I want the return into my nostrils of the smell around this of moment. How did he smell? Probably I won't remind myself these hands cutting my freedom but I am going to seek their image of the life in my awareness until my end defiled. But smell…?????
If I believed in God, I could pronounce so for it prayer: let me one more time smell this smell, for God's so that I never forget the fragrance of the death and the fall. Yes, if believed… actually, why I don't believe in God? Why don't I have this archetype in myself? Whether he is given few and chosen?
I remember that as a child I was being taught about certain laws and commandments. World was mosaic sorted out, certain order. In the while after the sincere verification for my heart of these relations, I started belabouring the nature of the sin. Of it because in me indeed was quite a lot. Bodily probably the most. And suddenly I am reading that „self-denial” is a cardinal sin in the very important matter! Yeah just a minute, I am doing a lot, but certainly not abnegate I am belabouring things, rather it to the row parts. So…???? Yes, I live without the sin and my bloody- lesbian nature is warping the parental power. I just think so! Ha ha ha, beware parents! One's daughters into tethers but sons into cuffs. I in this text already too much revelled, so to finish the time.
Into next parts about it, in what way with the help Miriam I rebuilt my besmirched nature of the femininity!
In the land of the eternal rest. Cz.1
I lifted oneself higher and higher over lands, forests, rivers, waters, the time. Spaces merged into the unity and the time smoothed its bends. Out of this many thoughts she stays, out of this many faces - with the one you remember. I am putting consecutive paces but I don't smell base. I am treading above the earth, I am slowly breaking away since the time. Like on the outskirts of town, do I live without the possibility of the return? Ways won't clash but they will stay endlessly directly opposite.. This way I will be heading, already forever, to the land of my eternal rest. There are senses, not-can consume reality. There are thoughts, not-wanting the word but without the announced admission they are becoming involved in the awareness. I had a feeling, that not to have control of them it is a crime. I wanted to get the control. Internal calmness. But pain was left as the bloody toll. And I lost that control, forever. This miserable existence amongst the healthy human kind how it seemed to me was impossible. The only way led into the land of the eternal non-existence. No, it an escape could not be, too quickly she would be made. It is a, gradual, long-lasting, explicit process. Comparable with making the organism conditional on the drug this way, products of our mind can be chemically toxic, and chemistry when the time will become involved in the system, is killing thoroughly.
Detoxicating here won't help. There are always tracks on crossed footpaths of our sojourn. It remained so to wait, not much however I knew, what for
Of creatures it is in the land of the eternal peace a lot of, all very friendly. They aren't showing the unnecessary, courteous kindliness. They don't want more beyond the nature. They are hiding their desires always, inside, but only under the thin surface of the skin. Always opened to your frenzy, under eyelids are preserving yesterday's images from dreams.
They aren't screaming, they aren't accosting, they are full of the illusion and songs are whispering in your ear wasted.
These creatures know that your end will come sooner or later therefore they are patient and they aren't seeking the interest. The land in which I was is standing out for one reason. Here everything is given forever, for free and at once. There is no therefore of poverty, despair, collapse into the chaos. Choosing her you want to travel here more than the eternity. You crave for only that being united with the land of the eternal rest, independently whether your eyes just dreamt.
Cars are heading in one's vehement pace ahead, with road about the moderately popular name.
I beside. Ruled out. On the edge of the life. Outside the current of the present time. I am standing this way as erect as the string, flexing one's buttocks, tightening thighs in order not to lose one's femininity. I am exposing my inherent abilities to attract to the public judgement. The man became my ogre for taming, to the power struggle above my delight. Heart of the hurt woman, indifferently, with which cruelly, will never plunge in the confidence in its saviour. Probably, it will be angel from the eternity or some torturer, what with one move for that hurt being an end of torment is able to cut the throat and to buy it panes. But I could not of nobody so to meet, not even here, not even in the land my rest.
My thoughts ran after tracks left by the torturer, and I thought where these birthmarks would lead me. Now I know that they were a pass to world about more refined tenderness.
I don't remember exactly when on my footpath I met damned souls Miriam. This event was for me so excitingly emotional that completely it had covered tracks of its being up. As the sandstorm, what passing by us he is putting all grains of the life away, this way the meeting with Myrrhs caused the transformation in me in cyber-awarness it to appear from dreams, sweeping my life out beyond the bracket of the existence, actually to its edge. One thing is certain, she captured the Land of the Eternal Rest, like the self-appointed queen. She adopted rule in the kingdom where I was you for myself. But that history won't end so straight, since I was going to dethrone it, to belittle its service and to envelop the throne of my serfdom for the second time..
Any time I can run Cz.2
Return from the land of the eternal rest.
Another step back and I will stay here forever. In some moment I could turn back, but with one's eyes fixed on the abyss and the time completely I forgot myself. A walk remained for me on the edge, urban busy communities and the dance amongst foul-smelling streets. The short girl has coloured pencils in the pencil box, older tampons in the vanity case. The adult woman apart from memories and wrinkled cheeks is already leaving nothing for itself. The authority of the being about which he knows extremely quite a lot is inviting her to chats by cognac or the coffee. I didn't want to be in a century for adults, I sought the lost time, in order can see one's face in the mirror, to look at oneself and to express joy for the body, for the soul and the heart. Those yearnings for men were supposed to save small Su so that experiences soothing, father's love one more time what looking at his short princess joyfully for her will whisper to the ear: welcome little doll! Let us dance!
But the lost time in the paradise disappeared, for paths of the virginity I won't return. After the first meeting with the guy to say I can whether love is attainable in our future bedroom. In bitch calculating creatures from the Land of the Eternal Rest exchanged me and the bad queen persistently chained me to the throne and at her legs she seated. She gave me the serfdom for years and I enjoyed defiled joy to the full. With kisses of the throne to atone I wanted my being but for her insatiable will demanded the rule from me so a lot. For me a queen fueled desires, when discouraged I put the head for her on knees. She plied with insults from her womb, she wreathed with thighs, invited into corridors of desires opening the new door every now and then. This magic theatre drew me so firmly that I forgot about my losing. She fed me on delicacies putting better tit-bits of the amatory illusion every now and then into the mouth. I willingly swallowed them down and widely I opened my mouth ready to adopt every male demand and every feminine doubt. Crouching, always beside, my queen stood fueling desires for them to boil in my temples.
I put to escape, to break free from the rule. To exchange the weakness by force and to starve every cell of one's body so that she sucks supplies and bodily yearnings. Hunger deepened but I didn't let desires in senses release temptation. Held on the tether and infuriated to the max, by surprise ran their tormented coalition. I included the control. I was as the stepmother what with the whip is subjugating one's adulterous children every individually training for oneself next time. I knew that it is they at one time would provide to me with surviving.
I gathered all my strength for the contest, the queen didn't already so firmly defend her borders. I entered my lands, proud, straightened, conscious of one's power. With the army breastfed with own breasts, I left behind human, crude, common games. I started implementing new principles of action and my ideas forged in the logic of events. Willingly subjects accepted the new Woman. They were grateful for those experiences to her. Now forever the created femininity fell, but straight and greedy nature, lured to the obedience, overcame my fears and greed's.
On the highest platform in the Land of the Eternal Rest attitude one's palace. I will seat myself on the throne which is him facing to my womb. On the right-hand side they will appear loyal, on the left the ones which I will behead and I will burn at the stake. I am thinking whether I am supposed to be a cruel queen and whether I am able so to be. In the fight because, my aggressive I it was left stripped off and tamed, so anew I must probably revive the ability to destroy in myself. But this time it will be refined, physically instinctive and spitefully causative for every became musty of ravenous being.
I will start my rule over the sexual land with the great travel to breaking points. I will invite most eminent and most beautiful lovers of entire madness here. The land of the Eternal Rest will receive the new name: of Eternal Delight! Everyone who will be opposed to my governments, he will be executed, I am not tolerating the different opinion, I will name this system SEKSUALdemokracy. And by the throne they will have the admission to the chamber few, chosen by me. The rest let will rot away in its gutters, excrement and puke. I became the merciless Woman.
In the land of the eternal rest pt 3.
Times of the deceptive bliss ensued. Lascivious queen, after dethroning one's rival, she decided that the serfdom would be abolished, a time of the equality and the sexual promiscuity will ensue. Social class of old order however didn't disappear. In the Land of Delight a truly exceptional division was supposed to become scratched. To her throne the queen invited deviant individuals exclusively extremely, so which rotten and cold senses were able to interest and to stimulate for her. They seemed to be a favoured group Akrotomofilities . Individuals about gloomy, pale faces and the look full of the lascivious beauty. They had satin, black-purple robes which with pride they put to their warped, naked bodies. They didn't wear the underwear, and they have caused needed obstruction once a year. They were impurity saint. They satisfied their erotic urges desiring the person faulty and besmirched, for them however were it is for the belle worth the great sacrifice. Also in their caste, inside, female persons were, bodily flaws which they appointed had them for their partners. One they had breasts without teats, they were different without the hand, or legs. Those the disability was a pass to world of sexual imaginations Akrotomofilities. They treated them with pride and the circumspection. The queen adored to savour the view of their naked bodies during sexual orgies. She ascended the throne completely naked, for her the body smelt of oils of the mint, the ginger and the gardenia. From her pussy however the smell was so intense from the excitement, that he had stretched around the entire royal chamber. Her satin, black-golden bedding saturated with the smell pussy secretions, semen's of its lovers, sweat and blood which the queen dropped for itself passionately into the golden goblet, after every undergone relationship one each millilitre. They were the second peculiarly cherished group of sexual deviants Zoofilities . Very queen at one time experienced lascivious pleasure around with one's mutts, when she was still a young and inexperienced little woman, when the eroticism was a perilous enough game, that passionately she had caressed dogs, ordering them to lick clean juices of their youthful womb. Of course it didn't give the permanent train to relationships rise to at her with the game, rather this way later she treated her lovers. They were only dogs for her, which done up on the leash could yelp at its large bed. For her sinful memories from the past caused that for that group she had felt the great kindness outstandingly. She gave them all needed priorities on orgiastic meetings surrendered. Outside also individuals were regular guests from the group Tanatofilies, specially selected from the entire country. Proudly they enacted stages of the own death so that triggered with erection at the queen to please and to familiarize it with the state of stunning senses. This court theatre caused that living in the palace had swum much more curiously. Young boys have most often been actors about the beautiful, pale skin, very beautiful privates and woefully sad eyes. This view very much amused the queen, since she loved the game of contrasts in human passions. She detested the uniformity and the predictability of erotic events. If some closeness evoked the boredom at her, immediately she sent back to her awareness his participants to edges and she reproached from the palace. Therefore subjects have invented newer games every now and then, from pissing into crystal glass small glasses and little bottles so that can place them on etageres, by plying it with series of photographs of the charming body in positions of delight in which she played a part of the porno starlet. Funniest and favourite however for the Queen was a game narratofilies . She adored with hours to hold talks about one's sexual activities and subjects in the palace. For her funny gossip was being thought up and alone she also made a list one's in the pocketbook, bound in leather from the baby. Beyond the bracket social arrangementat in the kingdom for you threw away: kleptofilities , hyfefilities and ekstrementofilities . These groups fell into disgrace, since contacts with the neighbouring, nonfriendly kingdom and his master, the black prince held about sad-masochistic roots. Cruel man that he competed and he claimed the throne for himself in the Land of Delight, so the queen had to cautiously select for itself of one's companions so that a spy and an informer of the prince aren't among them. He could then hand down to him the newest techniques of sexual intercourses and deprive it of the throne. Dark kingdom of the prince, where the power fell among others stygmatofilikities, pyrofilikies , nekrofilikies and gerontofilikies , into dominion they took over insidiously, depriving the Queen of the influence for years. Therefore the reluctant queen was it for social groups what he/she isn't marking, that she didn't have similar desires. For example very much she was tied mentally and emotionally around piktofilikies , raptofilikies and symforofilikies . Alone she was fond of checking breaking points of the own drive to the destruction and aggression. She planned therefore to possess at one time, after reinforcing one's power, into having those groups and to lead them to the Land of Delight so that they settle and they lived in the bliss. Of course into the portrait gallery of her acquaintances the queen invited only deviants exclusive, that is to an permanently marked with the brand of deviation, rather than casual adventurers, from the leap of the anyone wishing with show to capture its heart and interesting.
Yes, living in the Land of Delight, the kingdom where the illusion is alternating with reality, but cyber-love with the real, swam with one's sluggish rhythm. Subjects played delicious, on tables young and well-toned women have always been full with basket cases knocked down willingly, the smell of their warm pussies not only delighted of lovers, but everyone who came to these sides. Cyber-walkers, sleepwalkers, divorcees, jaded princesses and ingenuous con men. Sellers of love wanting to sell it desire cheap and fanatic tormentors. Indeed this kingdom was a rich menagerie, and their queen as the magnet pulled all anyone wishing to herself to fulfil desire for the closeness.
If for you such experiences are immediate, you will certainly understand this fascination, but if you didn't still acquire the knowledge of secret inter-courses, this that story will seem to you the hilarious babble. And it can and even better, I will be not having .. to explain, whether real and those experiences are mine. Alone you will judge it.
In the Land of the Eternal rest pt 4
Travel to the Lake of Tears.
Ready procession, we can move – queen, a lackey said. Once a year the queen has set off on the travel to the Lake of Tears. Distant and distant ends of the kingdom, where the time is undergoing shortening, and space of the deformation, is becoming wrinkled and is pulling up under the influence of the light. To those edge it is possible to get only with one road, flowing to the other side of depths through the Lake of Tears. The travel is long and tiring, the same as preparations for it. The queen is making ablution of her body then, he is rubbing into his body fragrance, he is fasting through nine days, drinking only a spring water and he isn't undergoing sexual relationships. He is putting snowy-white robes on, he is shaving off hair on the pussy and the head, he is trapping nails. During a trip she will be reading only a Book of Revelations, the secret, bound into the scarlet satin book which nobody outside it can affect. In the kingdom amaranth and the lofty scarlet, the source of the immortality are a basic colour and a food. He lets the queen clean the harmful element causing swellings on hands and shoulders at her off the body, skwalen included in this thanksgiving plant is delivering the antidote to it. When he reaches his destination, he will sent the lackey back to the palace. The queen will stand up on the river lake, entire one's body will just spread fatty cream of the colour purplish red. He will take out seven small crystal glass little bottles of the big suitcase, in every a substance of the human origin is: urine, blood, sweat, tears, sewage, semen, juices of pussies. One should mix substances in the pearl goblet which will consume the light about the noon. Next he must drink this mélange of political elixir. Now, this way the prepared queen will wet her naked body in waters of the lake. They will lay on the edge, and will be waiting to the sunset. Then it will take place for her transformation..……………………………………….
Edges lakes became cold and marmoreally steep. Emerald and freezing water. Coolness constricted for the queen, on fingers of hands and legs had teats pale ciliates. She finally saw the Messenger. He gave her the sign for the travel. The transformation in the end could end up $AV$. She jumped into the water and she dove into depths, to the kingdom called the Land of Tears.
…………………………………………………………………………………………………..
She swam into the abyss, the black abyss. One after the other she passed levels inhabited by aqueous creatures: frosty dragonflies, voluted sea anemones, putrefactive lake spiders, fish without-gills, blind-fish, rapatak’s, moss’es and scorching hot. All they gave her a heartfelt smile. Sometimes she had a feeling, that too warmly. She wasn't lonely, she felt strange, but safely. All the time she swam deep into breathing lungs-gills during the transformation however given it by the Messenger, legs they merged and they covered with scales. She was a sea alarm about the supple and trained body. Distance towards the epicentre reduced and she felt butterflies in the belly. They fluttered with their wings as added pepper, just as if wanted to do for her out of spite or very much to piss it off. But was so deep that she could not turn back. It will be for a few moments on the other side, so she decided to ignore this provocation.
Dull and blunt sound crushed temples for her, he sewed through by feet to the skull. The skin started going numb, to creak, finally to crack. She came off all over the short distance, scales fell. The queen sat on the cold, marble lakeside, in the former human form. Pure, beautiful, new leather. She looked at hands, legs, the belly. She got to know her body and surprised with lightness, with which a transformation, moved to borders took place, started spasmodically laughing. She spent the hysterical giggles childishly. It lasted for it rather long and the lackey waiting for her return already for some time began to bore. Now the Queen didn't hesitate in her intentions. She came up to him and with one efficient movement cut for it head with samurai sword. The head came off surprised to the ground, she goggled and in the last breath she asked: why? I am not having .. for you to excuse myself! a queen cried – and she kicked the head so firmly, that the one rolling broke down into short distances. Yeah, now I was amused by – the queen dressed her robes, she put on stockings, the corselette of the leather unicorn and she moved into the return track to the Land of Delight.
Prophet and passions. Part 5
The act of cutting the haircut granted a new course of events the lackey in the kingdom. The freed queen from the dictatorship of the body had to now possess secrets of the spiritual influence on subjects and their sexual world. She felt a desire for the absolute power, she marked everyone who didn't abide by its requirements, spouting urine out for them to the mouth and doing the scar under the right shoulder. In exercising that diktat he mattered greatly Cyber-Prophet, willing and greedy for bodily experiences, with the knowledge much going beyond beyond customary understanding the sex and its power of the influence on subjects. And so the queen used his pointers, she sought advice of it in issues of the realization of cruel aims. Throughout the country a semi-darkness and silence fell. Groans during orgiastic parties severely were forbidden, and passions had to be a control and a power under the constant for the queen. It was a priority to realize whims for her, even the ones cruelest in one's form. Less they already fascinated perversion with the queen, and they started entertaining the courting games marked with aggression about the clean and lascivious form. She adored to tie and to put loops on from ropes to necks of one's lovers, to tighten it firmly while climaxing, and if some subject on the face showed at least a bit of the panic, she strangled him mercilessly, jumping in addition on his member, as if she settled the bull's hash. The groan of the strangled stallion incited her to borders of the possibility.
Times became dark. In the kingdom hunger and illness fell. However the queen worked out around Cyber-Prophet way to survive. Bodies of strangled lovers were being thrown into vats with the row of various spices and substance created from its regulations. They were being cooked and they were giving to tables. The queen was fond with view of, not conscious of nothing, eating their lovers subjects consuming those dishes, to be perhaps yesterday surrendering oneself to them. Because he is an essence of love to love to pain and to want second so insistently that eating its body is only bringing satisfaction. The queen felt how for the goddess and in a way she got that divinity. Tax return of semen of lovers and their blood poured out of wounds turned over during sexual relationships, the queen treated an specific antidote to boredom and becoming indifferent. She wanted above all else to measure her divinity with the divine prince of the darkness which one day she saw strolling around gardens of delight. He stood naked, proudly straightened, his privates about dimensions exceeding the standard. One look at such a beautiful prick in the feint was enough for her imagination to glide into areas of crazy sex experiments. She wanted to have possibility of biting his shapely buttocks and licking the behind, for putting the anus for it of various kind of toys, so as for example gold and crystal glass plugi, or pellets of the geisha. She wanted to flog it with the whip about iron catches and to tear its tasty flesh out all over the short distance on the back.
The queen put on sadomasochistic, lecherous dresses coming exclusively from the tailor's shops which alone she designed. Then she could only look at her subjects, she could dress beloveds of lovers to the evening fulfilment. She wanted the prince with all her might, to possess, to dominate his prick and to subjugate the mind. To experience how at the moment she can't ed stand the sight of .. , it was only given her to look and to fill one's senses up, to stimulate imagination still anew. She started falling down in numbness's madness, with hours swung her lighted body on the swing of delight, letting it for lovers scarcely lick the wet and wett pussy. She put collars and leashes on for them to necks, she led for walks in the palace, but they and living quarters for farm labourers had to submit themselves to her, she was pissing of them and spat on them. As soon as she had the willingness, she whipped with the horsewhip, sometimes so firmly that blood pulsing in their bodies from the excitement oozed through times for their dog-tired bodies. Being cruel is entertaining me - said. Nobody of you, lovers the same fallen, as lofty didn't cause me absolute delight until now!!! Until I possess the prince and his kingdom, I will be as much alone for you inaccessibly cruel, every desiring waking up in me every day without its body. For the first time the queen couldn't see the different answer to this drama, like only to appear in the ego of the prince by applying magic „Corruption of self-awareness” elixir. It threatened with losing by her and for her chosen one of senses. It could happen, that he wouldn't remember, whom he is. However power, with which she wanted one's chosen she was so huge, that in order to turn a course of events away, it was unfortunately too late. She left her corporality, she subjugated the spirituality, now she decided to cause the absolute thing - to join forever with one's chosen and to finish the rule. However I will describe that brutal scene next time, when the rain in the Land of Delight washes sadness away, and the wind assuages senses of left subjects of the kingdom, what in the chaos of despair and the oblivion taken of for oneself living.
Death of the Queen. Cz.6
She went the hill up, keeping the business end of the dagger proudly by the breast, the hand had cold and wanted to finish it quickly. One's hateful torment with oneself. He will wait for the semi-darkness, then probably an ON. will turn up His bright face and caramel eyes. Lightly brushed back to the back, medium-length hair. Swarthy from the wind, naked body. Carved shoulders like at the angel, very well cylindrical buttocks and privates fulfilled in delight. When our last closeness is supposed to look, whether it will be the ending included in sadness, or becoming the height this conversation? The body desires and he wants, but mind, where the evil appeared, without desire doesn't let her for tasting the lover of the night. He is sending back to the ego all thoughts deep into, he doesn't want to see his smallness. He is as whore tied up, on the neck with the collar, embarrassingly nice got very hungry to sensory experiences with him. Exposed to public torment with own thoughts is doing battle straight through dangerously explicit. Because the ending is beginning in drowning its sorrows, on freeing the body. Desire is persistent, the Prince is taking her into the land of his darkness, its eyes are blind, unseeing joys. They are giving passively, safe and free. He is only a bird what one's body is raising for fulfilling the eternal place, where orgasm is the height constantly beings. Uniting with the lover this way beautiful fear is seizing her already wishes himself nothing, and only for experiencing shared delight. The prince is making an incision in the wrist, he is giving into the mouth her his blood, for you he is drinking its essence of the life passionately. For her he is elixir and essence. He is becoming him. He is making him out, he is uniting with the body with the soul, the ego. For this desire she was born. For this moment she is ready to die. He is stretching the wing feather out with one move is putting the blade into the artery on the neck. She is feeling warmly, drowsily, he is swimming away. The prince is uttering the penetrating, deaf shout. He is rising to the sky and with shoulders dragged out to clouds he is turning into the nocturnal butterfly. There is a night. Coolness and the icy cold wind. The moment, but wings will still harden, their flutter will stop. Another human breath, but living died out to hundredth seconds. The land of the Eternal Rest no longer exists. The land remained for Delight, but without one's queen what spontaneously deprived oneself of throne. But left her passions for subjects in made a list with own blood from silk menstruation „Largest pages of the delight” Book.
Epilogue.
…
In the end I was found.
I started a family, I gave birth to two children, I fell in love with the husband. I left the dark universe of the illusion behind. From darkness and all subjects the kingdom alone absorbed the prince into itself. I am cooking dinner, like the good mum. No longer I am visiting sides of the ignorance covered with heavy, velveteen veils. I walk for walks with children and the husband, to the park. The touch is the height of love, to it I don't need perversion. What was fascination is subjugated. They accused me, that I hate people, I don't comprehend, why? There are good and bad days in my life, but always in the context of love. Finished studies, times of the frenzy and the luxuriant erotic fantasy also. Travel into the cabbage stalk of my mind, where demons lurked was finished. Past: the childhood and the youth, I described, I cried and combined I returned to oneself, to the life, to the husband and children. Now he is as a default and calmly. Through six months, lying in wait and writing blogs, I deepened the own psyche in order to make cleaning. I did it publicly, I made the confession towards net the public. I don't pity not a single one word, because it was real, swimming from deep inside for my soul, from the dark, turned plot of the life which I wanted in this way to share with you. Every living is important, every peculiarly unique, I believe, that also and my. And happiness more often than we think comes. Unexpectedly.
I am greeting warmly.
Suzanne Volter.
Paris.